Skip to main content

TIFU by leaving a sex toy out

Really yesterday I was looking for something and came across a Fleshlight quick shot (clear and looks like an hole or lips depending on which side) that we’d used before and after I got the snip. I hadn’t used it in about two years, so I took it out to throw away—but then my work computer rang, so I set it down in the kitchen to take the call.

Fast forward a couple of hours: my wife comes home from work, then my twins get dropped off by my mother-in-law, and it’s still sitting there. We’re all talking in the kitchen, and I spot it next to the kids’ lunch boxes, behind my mother-in-law’s back while she’s leaning against the counter. Then she and my wife switch spots, and they keep talking for 45 minutes—meanwhile, I’m dying inside.

I fully expected my wife to say something last night, but she didn’t. Now I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop, because I’m definitely not bringing it up.

TL:DR I left a sex toy out with my MIL over

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU - Don’t do what I did

On Sunday morning Aug. 24th, I awoke to discover a large blind spot in my right eye, which turned out to be what is called wet age-related macular degeneration (AMD). It has resulted in a very significant, permanent loss of vision in that eye. Although I maintain good peripheral vision, whatever I focus on at best is very blurry, and mostly disappears. I can barely make out the large E at the top of the eye chart. If this happens to my left eye I’ll be unable to read or drive. It turns out that I missed the opportunity that I had to prevent this from becoming a serious problem because I failed to report what appeared to be minor changes in my vision. In the weeks prior to August I had noticed that what I knew to be straight lines appeared to my right eye to have a little waviness. I also noticed that the color of my front lawn, which I could see through the window from my recliner,  was subdued, looked almost gray, in my right eye. So I scheduled an eye exam, which revealed the p...

TIFU by getting suspended for 2 days by my front office in school.

I (13M) am an African American student at Jeannette junior high who had got suspended for 2 days here. I was in math class minding my business until my teacher had told me to go to the main office, which posed no problem to me. As i went down there, the people of the front office had stopped me and made me get a new ID (yes, we have id's.) so i had asked them if i could maybe do a different alternative and call my mother to let her bring the Id here, even then, the Id isn't that important. So, although i was talking to them in a calm manner and not showing any signs of rebellion, they had threatened to call the police on me without thinking twice before calling my parents. This is where i started getting angry, and even then now the black peers agree that could have been a racially motivated action. They then told me to sit in the office conference room because of that, leading into more anger. They had then called my mother who had came over to the school didn't even let ...

TIFU Accidentally taught my 4 year old nephew the word chlamydia

So I very awkwardly taught my nephew, the word chlamydia the other day and not in the way that you would think… It was actually very innocent. I was with one of my sister’s friends and my friends who’s become part of the family and I was telling her about an interesting fact, not thinking about how my nephew was right beside us. I told her did you know that koalas can get chlamydia and that they can give it to humans… just a fun fact… and then he who can barely say clear words most of the time clearest day said koala chlamydia so that happened And he went to his grandmother’s house today, so I’m kinda hoping he doesn’t say that, but at the same time I would die laughter and about pee my pants if he did because holy crap, how do you react to that? TL:DR I shared a fact about koalas and my nephew hung on to two words from the sentence. Those two words which he repeated were koala chlamydia.