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TIFU by plastering a permanent male appendage onto my brother’s wall.

I M17, plastered a massive one square meter schlong onto my brothers wall today. For revenge.

Last week I woke up from a nice, calming dream and opened my eyes to see an A4 peice of paper taped on my roof that said “Fck you.” directly above my head. there was no reason behind it. When I confronted my brother about it his reasoning was that he was bored. I thought it ended at that, so I got my brother back by putting saran wrap around his door and I made paper chains with little insults written on each loop and I taped that to his roof. He simply laughed and asked if I “found them yet?” I was confused what he meant by that but he wouldn’t say anything else so I left it at that. A few days later. At 12:00 at night, a poster from my wall falls to the ground, and behind the poster is a note tapped to my wall. (Crazy coincidence, it’s like my bedroom purposefully uncovered the note) The note had “tickle my urethra.” Written on it. I then decided to check behind a poster next to it to see if there was another note, and to my surprise there was yet ANOTHER NOTE behind ANOTHER POSTER! This note said “you’re a C*ck Sucker.”

To give you a description of my room. I’m a maximalist, so every single part of my 4 wall room, along with my roof. Is covered in posters. Big posters, little posters. To give a rough estimate, I have around 60-70 posters in my room. My unemployed older brother taped insults behind every single one of those posters. After discovering this, I had to take every single one of those notes hidden behind my posters, off my wall. which meant I stayed up till 2am. Some of my favourites were “sir Tiny PP”, “eggplant gobbler.”, and “ur made of Prec*m.”

I got home today after a day out with my friends, tierd because I got no sleep. And when I walked into the house I was told by my dad that my brother had went on a long hike and won’t be back for a while. He’s redoing his bedroom and he’s been plastering all the holes in his walls recently. So, I decided I would take it upon myself to plaster a massive meter long dingle dangle onto his bedroom wall. I took my time and made sure I was very detailed. I then pointed his lamp towards the new art peice on his wall to create a spotlight on it. And I put a speaker in his room that blasted toxic by Britney Spears as he opened the door. And when he walked into his room I heard a loud “OH MY GOD” and I was so satisfied.

It’s 7pm right now and he’s sanding down the giant Jerry Johnson, it’s been a good 30 minutes and every time I walk past his room I just see him rubbing it with sand paper and it cracks me up.

I royally screwed up because now he’s plotting revenge. I thought it would end there but apparently he wants a war? So now I’m stuffed because I know him and he’s not going to hold back. I’m scared for what’s to come but prepared to do anything it takes to send billions of nukes his way.

What would you do? End it or escalate it?

TL;DR my brother put paper note insults behind every one of my 70 posters. So I got him back by plastering a penis on his wall. Now he’s plotting revenge.
Photo of the ✨wall art✨

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