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TIFU by not wearing my glasses when taking pain medication

I should preface this that I have horrible vision. Not legally blind or anything, but if I’m not wearing my glasses, everything is just blurry blobs. To properly read text on ny phone, I have to hold it 2 inches in front of my face. (My prescription is like -6.75 if that means anything for you.)

Last night, while in bed, I was experiencing pretty bad cramps. I try to grab for my glasses in the night stand so I can go get some pain meds, but I knock them off between the med and the nightstand. Tired and not wanting to have to act like Velma, I just fumble my way to the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. Blearily I squint into the cabinet and see the generic white and blue bottle of ibuprofen. Grab it and pour four pills into my hand. Yup! Those are the generic red, round pills of ibuprofen I usually take!!! I swallow them and take a sip of water, grab my heating pad and head back to bed. The heating pad helps just enough with the pain I’m able to fall asleep.

Then just after a little after 4:00, I wake up to some truly awful cramping and an urgent need to go. Right now. Do not wait. I run to the bathroom and for the. Next hour (or what feel like at least an hour) I am groaning and moaning as my bowels expel themselves of every last trace of waste and water from my body.

After an hour of fighting for my life, I finally feel it’s safe to go back to bed. As im washing my hands, I squint down to see the pill bottle of ibuprofen I took earlier and noticed the white cap. Weird, I thought to myself, I thought, I thought it had a red cap. I bring the bottle a ln inch away from my face and read “stool softener and laxative.” I feel my soul leave my body once I realized that I had taken 4 stool softeners instead of 4 ibuprofens!!!!

I have been fighting for my life (and to keep hydrate) all day. Between the laxative, and period cramps, I am in true hell. I have barely left my bathroom. Please send help!

TLDR: I took the max dose of a laxative instead of pain killers and have been shitting my brains out all day.

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