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TIFU Currently happening: I went to bathroom and didn’t look around first

This is my current situation. I am stuck in my bathroom. I had to go #2 really bad so i ran to the bathroom and sat on the toilet to do my business. I have been watching TikTok’s and reading Reddit for a good 30 min as i usually do in what i consider my fortress of solitude. My legs started to go numb which is my usual sign that it’s time to get off the pot. I put my phone down and I reach for the toilet paper. This is where i notice my critical error… there is none. There is no one in my house and i have to be at the bus stop to pick up my kids in about 10 min. Now i have a few choices: waddle out of the bathroom and try not to make a mess on my journey to find toilet paper. Use my hand and just wash throughly after the fact or wait for my wife to come home which should be right before my kid gets off the bus.
It’s a choose your own adventure situation. TLDR: i didn’t check the bathroom for toilet paper before i went #2

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