Skip to main content

TIFU by wiping with mint toothpaste

Scene: We got our kid one of those full mouth toothbrushes and those require a foaming toothpaste. So it sits out on the bathroom counter. We also use a cleaning foam instead of flushable wipes because they’re not really that flushable. This also sits out on the counter

They look like this: https://imgur.com/gallery/ki1xjwl

I’m sure you can sense where this is going. Over the weekend I’d eaten some spicy Thai food, which you know, has its own downsides. Monday, I’m going about my business and finish with a cleaning foam wipe. All of a sudden things are on fire back there. I assume it’s because of the Thai food so I’m uncomfortable but what could I do about it. I stand up and walk away. Now the burning has increased and it’s starting to sting. I’m in a lot of pain. The Thai food was spicy but it wasn’t so spicy that it should be causing this kind of a reaction. Unfortunately for me, I have to get on a video call with my boss. I’ve got no chance to do anything else but writhe in pain for the next 30 minutes.

It wasn’t until later that day when I go to help my kid with their teeth that I see the toothpaste uncapped on the counter. The wiping foam is nowhere to be seen in the bathroom. And this is the moment I realized I wiped my ass with mint toothpaste and that’s where the extreme burning and pain came from.

Tldr: I wiped my ass with mint toothpaste thinking it was butt cleaning foam.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU By Fumbling My Gym Crush

I've never posted on Reddit before so apologies if anything is off. I (F) had a crush on a man at my gym for months. We would make extended eye contact frequently, workout in proximity, the usual gym things that get over analyzed when you like someone. He's wildly handsome, but I liked his vibe. A lot. It's hard to explain when someone's energy just hits different but his did. One day he started coming in with a woman. The day I saw her with him, he and I actually stared at each other from across the room for a while, and I turned and walked away because obviously gym rules - that's his girlfriend until I'm told otherwise. The eye contact continues and so does the proximity but I've dialed back completely because in my head, he has a girl and I am no home wrecker. Well, recently, on a Sunday, I was having a real shit day. I accidentally hurt my shoulder so my back day was all off, my body wasn't cooperating, the gym was packed - all I wanted to do w...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by getting called racist for not handing cash to a customer

today I (F18) fucked up by worked a long ahh shift and got put on register. I never hand money in people’s hands as customers have yelled at me for it, and i think it’s germy so I scoot it towards them as a sign of respect. this lady came in and after i did that she goes “Imma need you to do that again and put it in my hand, you did this last time too don’t you know it’s disrespectful” (meanwhile i haven’t worked register in 2 months at said job and didn’t recognize her) so i apologize, and then cuz it’s call off time i go talk to my boss about it and they all agree with me. apparently though she told my keyholder who’s a poc i was being RACIST by not touching her. so i got told i need to do better even though i didn’t do anything. she was insinuating i was a racist. idk if i should quit or what but i fucked up. TL;DR: i’m a dumbass
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by sh*tting in the bushes at a high school

So I’m training for a local 10k race in a couple months. That’s about 6.2 miles. Not a long race but not a short one either. I’m making good progress and tinkering with what works for me on longer runs, how I can keep my body moving at an easy, consistent pace for about 70-80 minutes. I’ve been increasing the distance over the past few months, prioritizing getting the distance down before I work on pace. I train early mornings at a local high school track within walking distance of my house. They have public hours almost every morning from 6-8 am. It’s a very nice track with good lighting and ✨no public bathrooms✨. Because I’ve been focused on increasing distance I’m waking up earlier and earlier to get to the track and really hammer it out before I go home and shower for work. In turn, I’ve been drinking a little extra COFFEE most mornings get my body going. Til now this hasn’t been a problem, I don’t leave the house until my body takes care of business. I successfully dropped the ...
Post a Comment
Read more