greenmangostudio

Obligatory this happened last night. I’m in an Airbnb with friends to celebrate New Years. We are in a different city and I happen to know a girl close by so I invite her over. Meets my friends who are playing Ark Nova. I’m playing music on my JBL speaker in the living room. Woman and I have been talking about doing the deed for the first time so I’m like bet, there’s a bedroom in the basement. Into the basement we go. Light off, clothes off getting nicely acquainted. I ask if she wants to watch porn because it was something we talked about doing. I pull out my phone. Find a video and I’m like why isn’t my volume working, SO I TURN IT UP, but nothing. I hear scrambling upstairs like someone running. I look at my sound and I AM STILL CONNECTED TO THE JBL SPEAKER! I’m mortified! Tell the woman and she’s laughing. I’m like well I turned off the Bluetooth, let’s just keep going and she agrees. Watch said video, do the deed, and all was amazing. Then the post nut clarity of having to fac...

This happened to me about 2 weeks ago. So I run a business and have 2 partners, together over the last 5 years we have bought at least 15 trucks. All from the same dealership. Now something to note is that every time we buy a new truck we always just write a check and don't deal at all with getting loans, it just works easier and saves us time that way. About a month ago I had decided I wanted a new truck because my current one had a couple of issues and a lot of miles. I found the exact model that I wanted and sent it over to the salesman I always go through at the dealership. He found the exact color and model that I wanted and told me that he could have it to me in 2 weeks. That is typically how it goes between us so I said thanks and just started looking forward to the day I could pick it up. The day he told me it was ready was a Thursday at about 10am but, I needed to be out of town that Friday evening and through the weekend so I asked to have it delivered that same day. He...

Hello, I made a mistake a big one and I’m currently very very very very very depressed. Basically from Saudi Arabia I was accepted three months ago into medical school dental school engineering school and computer science and chose dentistry was happy about it for a few weeks then after some researche, I only realized how oversaturated it is, and it is getting, and it will be in 10 years when I graduate so after trying to cope for like a month or two I finally came up with a decision to change and leave dentistry Now I’m living in deep regret and extreme depression. I feel like I should’ve chosen medical school. I don’t have a certain passion by the way or interests, my own passion is for a happy life (money could help). I’m currently regretting not choosing medical school. Basically, I have three options in front of me and I want your help. First option is to join in energy engineering bachelor then go to Germany and make a masters in renewables then work there in Germany for like 5 ...

I am a freshman in college now, and in high school, toward the end of junior year, I decided I would love to learn a new instrument. I'd played trumpet since 5th grade, and was very into music, band, and everything surrounding it. I loved (and still do love) the sound of the Saxophone, so I decided to keep playing trumpet for band, but learn Alto Sax on the side in my free time. I was extremely excited and rented a Saxophone from a local shop for a few months, took private lessons, researched new mouthpieces and ligatures, I tried everything and was very passionate about my new hobby. I would bring it to school and sit in a practice room during my off periods and practice, I spent all of my time on this. Flash forward to now... I've just finished my first semester in college, and have met people and done things that I have never thought about before. I got really into rock climbing and snowboarding, I also spend a lot of time at the gym. My life took a 180 where I used to lik...

This happened about 2 weeks ago. I co-founded this small AI startup with my friend, and we got a bit carried away with customer requests. Every time someone asked "Can you add support for [new AI model]?", we'd say yes without thinking twice. Started simple enough - just OpenAI's stuff. Then Anthropic. Then Cohere. Then Mistral. Before we knew it, we were juggling 10 different APIs, each with their own quirks. You know how it goes - you start with a clean codebase and end up with: if model == "OpenAI" {doThisStuff()} else if model == "Anthropic" {doThatStuff()} // repeat 8 more times... I realized how bad it had gotten when I spent an entire afternoon just updating API keys because half of them had hit their usage limits. Meanwhile, my co-founder was asking why our latest feature was taking so long, and I had to explain that I couldn't even test it because I was stuck juggling all these different API formats. The real "oh shit" mo...

Obligatory: this was actually a month ago, right after Thanksgiving Day in the US. Also, throwaway account because this is super embarrassing and I don’t want it to be tracked back to my main. My wife (F46) and I (M48) were visiting family out of state for Thanksgiving. After the holiday, we traveled north to visit one of our kids (F21) who had just moved to the area for her first professional job since graduating. We arrived while she was still at work and planned on exploring the town while waiting for her to be ready to join us for dinner. We came across a weed shop (it’s recreationally legal in this state) and decided to pop in. A little back story here. My wife grew up in a very liberal family. Like, parents were at Woodstock kind of liberal. They were not shy about providing a safe space for their kids and their kids’ friends experimenting with weed, acid, mushrooms, etc. I, on the other hand, grew up in a very sheltered household as far as drinking and drugs went. My mom neve...

Today I was uploading documents to purchase a house and somehow managed to accidently upload an inappropriate photo, fully covered but it was 2 friends doing the silhouette challenge in just bra and underwear in red lighting, and I am unable to delete anything I uploaded so now others will see, not sure what to do. Ugh. I'm not even sure how it got uploaded in the first place but I also don't really want to add an extra attention to it so I'm not sure if I should sent an email and ask for it to be removed or just kinda stay silent and hope it gets removed/ is a clear accident. On the other hand I'm afraid if I stay silent it may cause additional issues. Not sure. TL;DR uploaded an inappropriate photo to bank mortgage loan portal and unable to remove it.

Happened on Christmas Eve but just found out today. Been having a bit of a thing with a coworker. Before we both left work on Christmas Eve we said ‘goodbye’ in a meeting room. I’m friends with one of the security guards and she’s put herself at risk by telling me but it turns out there’s now cctv in the meeting room (which I didn’t know) and the footage has been passed on to our managers. She called me today knowing I’m back in work tomorrow and didn’t want me caught unawares. It was definitely NSFW - I certainly had bare nips on display (I’m female). I’m crucified with embarrassment about management seeing me naked but obviously also worried about losing my job, which I’ve had for less than a year. TL;DR - manager given cctv of me with bare nipples with my co-worker in work and not sure what happens next.

I (18F) has been working at my part time job at a government run amusement park for the past year. I believe I've been a great worker, I'm responsible and serious and have rarely had any negative talks with my supervisor. I believe I've always put in my best work and I've been a good asset to the team. My job hosts very regular training sessions, since we do different things in the amusement park for every season (e.g. fall we become a haunted park and winter we are a skating rink). I've noticed this from the start, the job would never indicate if the training was online or in person. The first few trainings we got emails telling us if it was in person or online, but afterwards I've just been reaching out to my supervisor asking if the training would be online or in person. From this, I've caught the pattern that 2-3 hour trainings are always hosted online and I've only had in person trainings that are a minimum above 5 hours since it's a hassle to...

This didn't happen today, it happened when I was 8 y/o (20ish years ago) and happened over the course of a a few weeks give or take. So when I was eight, my cousin got married. In my culture, you don't serve the wedding cake to the guests, instead the tiers are given out to the bride's family, groom's family and one special tier. I came to find out that the 'special tier' was for a small ceremony after the first 100 days of the wedding (how cake is meant to last that long without going bad, I truly do not know to this day). Anyway, a few weeks after the wedding, I found the cake in my aunt's bedroom (groom's mum... also, weird place to keep a cake). My sweet-tooth instincts recognised the box right away. And lo and behold, it was cake. I resisted for a few hours honestly but the cake kept calling me so I took a bite out of it like a heathen. That left me with a problem: they'll know someone ate the cake... I came up with an excellent plan: turn th...

My GFs group of friends are into open water swimming, especially in the winter. My Gf has never been with them- I can’t blame her at all, it sounds horrible and I wouldn’t go. However when they’ve talked about going she’s always sounded really enthusiastic and very regretful that she can’t go because she’s working (which was always true). I semi believed she wanted to do it (hmm, maybe). They always do a charity swim on New Years Day and we are never around because we go to her mum. This year for various reasons her mum is coming to us. We’ve just been out with several of the friend group and I heard my GF say something about going to her Mum’s over New Year. I wasn’t really listening and butted in and said that she was coming to us in the afternoon. She then responded like oh yeah, she forgot and that works really well. Turns out, GF was using this as an excuse not to go swimming and I’ve messed it up. She’s mega competitive so unlike me she can’t just say she doesn’t want to do i...

To clarify before I begin, the only people who knew about my crush on... lets call her Sam, were my best friend and my brother. I (17F) have had a crush on Sam (18F) for almost a year now. At first I didn't do anything because she had just gotten out of a messy breakup with another girl and didn't want to pressure her into anything. Then I didn't do anything because it turns out she was my best friends crush, so I had to abide by the girl code. About 3 months ago that best friend gave me the all-clear to go ahead, so I began to ask Sam out. It started off as little things, going for milkshakes after school or just walking around the park for a few hours. But slowly we started hanging out with bigger things, getting dinner together, playing arcade games for a whole day, etc. We would hug each other whenever we greeted each other or were about to leave. hell, she even won me a stuffed elephant from a carnival we went to together! Now I'll be clear, I never explicitly a...

This actually happened several years ago. I met someone local on skout (app that I’m not even sure if it still exists). We exchanged pictures and I decided to pick her up later in the day in some shady part of town. When I show up, she hops into my car with another dude and asks if I can help them with something before he leaves. I could have asked them to leave but I was young and desperate. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t shitting my pants by now. I took them to their friends place which happened to be less than a block away from where I lived. My heart rate kept pumping as they kept navigating me back to where I lived. Once we were there, I was dreading if someone I know will notice me and expose my identity. I eavesdropped them talk about money with the person who lived there but the people I drove were not getting their way. At this point, I evaluated my life choices that brought me to that moment and told them I got to go and just left. She called me later that night to t...

This happened this morning, and I still can’t get over how stupid I am. Relevant backstory time, I currently don’t have a car. The transmission died on me in the middle of the freeway last week and in the meantime, until I get a car, I am living at my work, because lucky me, my work is a hotel, and I can work my shifts and just bum one of our small rooms after I clock out, because my General Manager is cool like that. Now another thing my lack of vehicle has me doing is picking up extra shifts at one of the other hotels owned my hotels brand. They’ve been short staffed for a while, and the GM over there is my GM’s boss, so I was able to pick up 5 extra shifts for the next two weeks, and I got all of my rides over there paid for by that hotels GM. Unfortunately all of those shifts occur directly after my usual shifts, but I need a car bad, and I appreciate that at least this way I get to keep my usual days off. Speaking of days off, one of those days off was Christmas Day. The other...

This FU happened a few Christmas’s ago, but the fallout finally hit this year. My MIL likes to get themed family gifts every year. Matching PJs, matching lap desks for the couch, etc. A few years ago, she texted the group chat (which my husband refuses to open or check) that she was buying everyone a personalized couch pillow. The kind that hugs you, and has pockets for remote/phone/etc. She sent the options she thought my husband and I would like and asked us to choose. They were tiny thumbnail pictures but I did my best. My husband loves anime, so when she suggested the anime one for him, I said absolutely, without looking closely at the pillow. Christmas Day arrived, we open our pillows, and my husband goes silent. He mumbles “thank you” and takes the pillow straight to our bedroom. When we watched movies later, MIL asked why he wasn’t using his pillow. He babbled a bit about not wanting the dogs to get fur on it, and changed the subject. That night when we went to bed, he show...

My wife always screams when she sneezes and it would always drive me bananas so I started to add a high pitched HEE HEE to the end of my sneezes as a little joke. I guess I have been doing this for about 14 years now and I don't really sneeze alot so I don't really think about it anymore. Anyways we had our work lunch this week and as I was eating I felt the urge to sneeze and didn't even think about it I just naturally sneezed and then loudly proclaimed HEE HEE afterwards to everyone's amusement. I couldn't really articulate the reason as it's so stupid I just acted like nothing was out of the ordinary but you could tell they found it very bizarre. I had no idea something so stupid could become so ordinary and accustomed to me that I would not think twice about letting out a michael jackson sound loudly in public in a professional business lunch. Tl;dr: got so used to mocking my wife's loud sneezes by adding a loud noise to mine that I did it at a wor...

I work in retail, we had some issue with theft, so we put barricades in form of a stanchion on two sides of the entrance, so customers are forced to exit only from one direction, which gives us better view into what they're carrying. Literally today I had a man steal something by putting it in his bag, and he ran out when I tried to stop him, so I was slightly on edge. Suddenly I saw that someone in a black jacket is bent over the stanchion, and tries to move it. I immediately ran towards that person, and politely, but still very sudden and loud said "GOOD MORNING" to grab their attention. He then literally started shaking, looked at me, and I immediately noticed that it's a (severely) autistic teenager... I know the kid, cause he's been here before, and he is non verbal, and I noticed in that moment that his parents were also in the store. He ran towards his mother and started crying. I almost died of embarrassment on the spot, apologized about ten times, an...

Very nice, very handsome french guy I met in Marseille asked me out. The date started with an afternoon tea and some french pastries, then we sailed on a sunset cruise with dinner. I blame those damn pastries (more on this latter). I had been on speedboats and never got even a bit sea sick, so I assumed everything would fine. But the universe woke up wanting to kick me in the teeth that day. We boarded and sailed, and the moment that ship's hull hit the first wave, my stomach synchronised with the cruise. If we went down, my stomach jumped to my throat; if we went up, it fell to the lowest part of my abdomen (there were moments I thought I was going to pee myself). I tried to lock my eyes in the horizon, but I was so dizzy and leaning sidewise that it wasn't horizontal anymore - just a diagonal line that changed it's angle of inclination with each wave. Then I began to taste and smell the sweet of those pastries again, which combined with the salty evening breeze, gave ...

This happened a few days ago, but it was about a month in the making. In Nov, my(41M) and my daughter (11F) went Christmas shopping. We went to a high name beauty shop and bought a bunch of stocking stuffers for my wife (44F). My daughter kept them in her room until it was time to load the stocking. My wife, somehow found out where we went, but didn’t know what we bought her. The following week, my wife gets an email from the same beauty shop…20% off coupon on all purchases. Rather than asking me to return everything and re-buy things, she wanted to take it all, return them, and re-buy things SHE wanted. Now, I didn’t realize this, but the location we went to was kinda of a medium size store, but there was a larger store a few more miles away that had designer stuff. So…my wife took everything we bought, returned it to the bigger store, and hands me a rather large bag with the things she wanted to be in her stocking AND other things I should wrap and give her at Christmas. Here’s w...

If you are like me and love international snacks, consider their shelf life before purchasing online. I live in America and my favorite snack is from Japan, it is not available in the states. Luckily I found it online. Because shipping was $50 regardless of quantity, I ordered a massive amount of this snack so i wouldn’t have to pay shipping again soon. Because of the long travel, the order took over 6 weeks to get to me. By the time it arrived, it was all expired. I have never spent this much money on a snack. I was so elated when they arrived and am now very sad and feel very stupid. At this point I am considering pretending like I didn’t figure out when they were expired and just enjoying the snack anyway. TL;DR: I ordered a massive quantity of a snack from Japan and it expired in its transit to America

I tried to post this story a month ago, but I guess it was my newbie account, or too many mistakes, and it didn’t go through moderation approval. I corrected it a little—maybe this time it gets published. Well, I don’t use English daily, and I’ve always been terrible with past tenses. Also, I might be a bit drunk. Please forgive me for any mistakes. So, basically, we have this family chat on WhatsApp. We mostly use it to exchange photos, links, and memes, but it’s also kind of a bulletin board where people post announcements about upcoming family gatherings and events. When I joined, I muted it almost immediately because my phone kept blowing up with endless photos of kids doing kid stuff. I love my family, but at some point, I was just done . I’m a terrible person, I know. Still, I’ve never worried about missing a party because my mom is super responsible and always calls me in advance to remind me. So, this Friday, my mom called me. Mom: Do you remember the housewarming party...

Decided to refresh my look before my passport photo appointment. Nothing too crazy... just a box dye job at home. The color on the box said Natural Brown, so I figured, what could go wrong? Apparently, everything! I ended up with something closer to radioactive orange than brown. But hey, the appointment was in an hour, and rescheduling would mean waiting weeks. I thought, how bad could it look on camera? Turns out, VERY BAAAAAAAD. When I got to the photo place, the photographer did a double take. After snapping the picture, he tried to stifle a laugh and muttered, bold choice. I didn’t have the heart to explain my botched dye job. Now, I’m stuck with a passport where I look like a carrot in human form for the next ten years. Lesson learned: never experiment with hair dye when a permanent ID photo is involved. TL;DR: Tried to dye my hair before a passport photo appointment, ended up looking like a traffic cone, and now that’s my passport photo for a decade.

So my wife (43f) and I (43m) have 3 kids, ages 11, 9, & 7. Not sure if the older two still believe in Santa, but the youngest does. But this year, we wrapped the kids' presents all in the same wrapping paper and put them out after the kids went to bed last night. After waking me up and drag me downstairs at 6am so they can look at their stash, I'm sitting there drinking my coffee and the youngest says to me, "Dad, did you get Santa's presents?" Me, still not fully awake: "What do you mean?" 7y/o: "Our presents are wrapped in the same paper as Santa's presents. Did you get them?" Me, on alert but still not functioning properly: "Well, what do you think happened?" 7y/o: "I think you got them. Is Santa real?" Now at this point I know I'm screwed. While I don't mind fudging answers on occasion, or not answering completely, or leaving things out, I do believe that direct questions require direct answers. Me...

Long story short, my in laws are staying with us for a few more months going on six now. They're miserable people have terrible relationships with their kids the only caveat being they're not terrible grandparents. My wife and MOL have a strained relationship and my mother on the other hand is great with us and the kids, regularly plans events/times to see one another and makes an effort to make things nice when she wants to host. My MOL on the other hand doesn't buy gifts for people, doesn't plan ANYTHING and lives off of doing everything last minute. She's also unreliable and can't be asked to contribute to family events. I woke up Tuesday morning early to help make some Christmas cookies and we were both up around 5am baking until about 8am where I decided to go shower, in the fifteen minutes I was away my MOL cornered my wife in the kitchen and was verbally berating her mostly because she's emotionally immature, addicted to weed edibles and kratom, and...

Obligatory this didn't happen today, though I was reminded of it recently and thought I'd share it with you all. Some years ago I moved into a house share with 3 others in a terraced house. On this particular day It was just me at home alone and was a warm summer's day with the sun beaming through our living room windows. I thought it'd be a good idea to get high by myself and as I sat there chilling baked on our couch I looked out the windows thinking how filthy they were. The dirt on the windows was frustrating me, so I decided I was going to clean them. I went and grabbed a bucket of water and a sponge and proceeded to head outside. A few minutes after I started cleaning the windows I heard a voice from behind me asking what I was doing. "Cleaning these filthy windows", I replied. The other person responded with "I can see that, but don't you live next door!?". I turned around and it was my neighbour who I'd only ever met in passing....

This was a while ago, but I just remembered that this subreddit existed. It's also a little silly, but maybe you'll get a laugh over it. So I (17M) am gay and in a rural area with a super high religious population. In my school of 600ish people, the only gay ones are only out to friends if they're out at all, so I'm the only one I know. Additionally, I was raised Christian with a decent helping of homophobia, so despite the mountains of progress I've made I'm still lacking a lot of self-confidence. Also, relevantly, I love music and am in a bunch of music classes. I've been out for less than a year at this point, and before that I wasn't even out to myself. I absolutely refused to admit that I was gay, because that would royally screw up my cute little Christian life plans. I convinced myself that I really just wasn't all that interested in dating in high school, and that I would just start it in college. Through therapy I finally got over that, an...

I'm so mad at myself. I started playing a new game recently and met a more experienced player. He'd been guiding me a little and showing me how to play. He came across super nice and never got off topic from the game. So I absolutely should have lied when he asked if I was a she. I've literally been through this before where I make the mistake of thinking it won't be a big deal. But now it's pretty clear he wants to be closer. This dude doesn't even know anything about me and we are on separate continents but he's acting different. I feel gross too because I'm 18 and the more he tries to talk to me, the more I get the feeling he's probably like 16 based on the bit I know about him. Conversations going from how the game works to little details about his life feels icky as hell. It feels like it's only a matter of time before the "hey can I tell you something" message happens. I do not know you, you do not know me!!! I personally have ha...

So I have an induction stove at home, I was cooking eggs in a pan maybe a few hours ago. I do remember removing the pan, so there is definitely nothing being heated on the stove. Unfortuantely my memory of whether I turned or turned off the stove is when things get hazy. I had a bus to catch in 30 mins, where I rushed packing and made my way out the door. So I don't have a recollection of turning the stove off. What didn't help was one hour into the bus trip was when I started getting the anxiety of whether or not I had turned off the stove or not. I reach my stop and book the most expensive lyft I've done so far, driving in snowy conditions to check whether or not my stovetop is on or off. An update will be given once I reach my house. It is very very likely I did turn it off and I'm making a very very expensive mistake going back home, but my anxiety has made me do this for the sake of making sure my house is safe. TL;DR I might have left the stove on in my house, an...

I’m relatively new to Germany, and something interesting happened to me today while I was grocery shopping. Since Christmas Eve and Christmas Day are holidays here, supermarkets were chaotic, with people panic-buying everything. As I was waiting in line to pay, a girl came up to the cashier and said (in English) that she had accidentally hit someone’s car in the parking lot. She was asking the cashier to announce the car’s number plate so the owner could come forward. The cashier didn’t seem to understand her or didn’t want to help—she just said something in German and dismissed the girl. I decided to step in because she was speaking English, and I could see she was stressed out. I told her to wait until I was done paying, and I’d help her figure things out. Once I finished, we went outside together to check the situation. She was clearly panicked, so I asked if she had insurance. She said she did (her father’s insurance, but she was also covered). I explained her options: Leave...

TLDR/ I told my boss about the time I got roofied. TIFU bc I shared about the time I was roofied with my boss. I am a terribly awkward person, but me and my boss have a pretty good relationship and work well together. Note: we’re both women so maybe I felt a tad safer sharing this infrequently shared information? But we were casually talking about true crime podcasts and how dangerous things can be and I said “yea me and some friends were recently talking about being roofied and it happened to me when I was doing blah blah” and I instantly felt the mood shift and tried to cover it all up with humour. Unsure if that worked. But oh my god I walked out mortified. I don’t find it vulnerable to talk about bc I was safe and nothing happened, thank god for good friends! But I don’t know why I shared that with my boss.

Long time lurker, first time poster; this happened about 30 minutes ago. To set the stage: This weekend, me and the folks were going out of town for a night at the grandparents' house where we'd exchange gifts, have dinner, and just generally enjoy each other's company over some old fashioneds after the little cousins are distracted. At home, we made a buttload of Christmas cookies that we planned on giving out to friends and neighbors. But, we had a problem, specifically, two small, furry problems that like to get into stuff that they're not supposed to get into. Their names are Randy, the fat ginger problem, and Harold, the skinny and insane problem. So, our solution, since we were already running late out the door, was to stick the trays of cookies into the oven, and then get on the road, with the cookies safe from their greedy little paws. Fast forward numerous drinks and plenty of good company, all three of us who promised to remember that the cookies were in...

For context, i used to work at Chipotle and Food Lion and other small jobs. I recently got hired at a sales company representing the computer/printer brand HP. Obviously, this is a huge step up for someone who was doing small part-time jobs like the ones I mentioned above. I'm 20 and never considered myself as "young and dumb," but today, I flew way too close to the sun. I picked up some hours at Best Buy, and it's my second weekend there. Basically, my job entails: stand around, sell some shit and what I knew but didn't follow this week - don't leave your post. Because I'm not employed by Best Buy, I wrongly thought there wasn't a supervisor watching my every move. Well, there was. The store manager. Over the past two days, I've taken to hanging out in the break room while the foot traffic was slow. I have a non-existent perception of time. It's either too fast or too slow. From the outside perspective, it looked like i was in the break ...

Original title but trying to adhere to the rules: TIFU because I didn't want a fart to make our anniversary worse. I'm posting for my husband: TIFU because I didn't want to trap a fart. Well, this weekend has been a shitstorm, pun intended. Yesterday, our heater went out, and after much deliberation, we had to bite the bullet and pay for a new one. It won't be here until Monday, so we're trying to to use blankets and space heaters effectively. Thankfully, a relative has decided to be generous and help us with half the cost so we don't have to finance. This past week at work has been one of the most stressful, as I'm trying to take over a retiring person's position. Next week will also be very stressful because we have all the appointments of the year scheduled because I don't ever take vacation. My dog, my car, and my house all need financial attention right now, and I feel like I can't catch a break. Anyway, today is our anniversary, and...

So, this happened last night, and I still can't believe I managed to mess up a perfectly romantic evening. My husband (M33) and I (F29) decided to treat ourselves to a fancy night away in a hotel. We booked this amazing spa wellness room that had its own jacuzzi and sauna. After settling in, we opened a bottle of really good wine and started to unwind in the jacuzzi. A few glasses in and I was feeling tipsy, confident, and downright sexy. That’s when I decided it was time to try out the sauna. This wasn’t just any sauna; it had a window so my husband could watch me "sweat it out" while enjoying his drink. It felt like a scene out of a (romantic) movie. I stepped in, made myself comfortable, and tried to lay down on the bench to look all relaxed and sultry. Key word: tried. The sauna was small, and, well, alcohol doesn’t exactly improve motor skills. As I was repositioning myself, I didn’t realize how close my head was to the hot coils. Suddenly, I smelled something... ...

TL;DR: Sleepwalking me bought over $200 worth of plastic penguins, and now I have 20 boxes of pudgy penguin toys coming to invade 🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧 So, I’ve been sleepwalking for years. Sometimes it’s harmless. Soemtimes I eat something I wanted to enjoy in the morning. But my biggest problem is sleep-shopping. I’ve had my share of incidents in the past (I still have ugly socks somewhere), but I thought I had it under control. Maybe I outgrew it you know? I thought maybe this was over. Woke up yesterday to find a medium-sized box on my porch. Opened it up and its A box full of plastic pudgy penguin toys. figured it might’ve been a weird mistake I was planning to see if maybe I had stuff sent to the wrong address. maybe a friend trolling me. This morning there’s another box of penguins. Went to check my Ebay account and shows 20+ separate orders for these chubby little penguin figures from different sellers. TWENTY BOXES. The main issue is I bought this on a credit card. So now there...

I fucked up yesterday on Friday and realizing my error today. Im a lone IT system administrator at my company and just dipping my toes in group policy management for the first time. I figured I’d start with something harmless like the sleep settings since people have been having issues with the default timer windows had on it. I figured for laptops people probably want them to save battery though if not plugged in so I entered 15 into the setting field and called it good. Fast forward to now, I’m trying to use my laptop and the screen kept turning off on me as I’m using it. Look at the settings and it says “less than a minute on battery.” Uh oh. That’s when I realized the field uses seconds as a timer, not minutes inside of group policy. Not sure if or when anyone will notice. Hoping I can fix it but if anyone brought their laptop with them home for the break and it synced to policy they are likely going to be very annoyed and confused. Tldr: changed computer policy for laptops not ...

genuinely so ashamed to even write this but i dont know where else to go. i feel like a fucking animal had a bad day. got out of work a couple hours later than everyone else. didnt want to go all the way to the back garbage, figured id just throw it out up front. it was empty. it was empty and i couldve just shoved it in there and i didnt, just put the garbage bag on the ground next to the trash can. for some reason i just didn't. i instead started to cross the street until someone who passed me by earlier started yelling at me from a bit away to put it in- and he was fucking RIGHT. i dont know why i didnt do it. it took him two times telling me to put it in for me to do it. i was so annoyed even though he was fully in the right. i think he literally knows me too. it was dark at night, so part of me hopes that he didnt see my face, but im going to apologize to him and thank him regardless the next time he comes in for an appointment. i cant believe i was just going to fucking ...

Today I took apart my dishwasher to give it a good deep clean, this includes removing the bottom washing arm so I could access the filter and give it thorough scrub. Ran the dishwasher and 40 minutes later my wife walked into the kitchen and yells, “Something’s on fire!” I ran over, opened the dishwasher and saw billows of smoke come out. I thought maybe a plastic lid came loose and came into contact with the heating element (it’s happened before), but turns out I didn’t reassemble the bottom arm and affix it to the washer. It was left lying on the heating element and just melted through. The disgusting burned plastic smoke filled the house. All the fire alarms went off. We have those fancy hard wired ones that also announce “smoke and carbon monoxide detected, evacuate the building.” My kids are in the living room crying. I’m frantically running around the house trying to open all the windows and doors and stop the alarms from firing. Finally asses the damage and the arm is almost...

Early this month I was getting back home from my GF house, when I stopped at a traffic light, right ahead my dad's car, there's a guy with half his body and a arm inside the car, in my immense Windom, I thought that's was a robbery and hit the guy with the car, it turned out the guy was the husband of the pregnant woman driving the car, police was called and everything and obviously I was at fault, we exchanged contacts and I contacted my insurance, I was honest with the insurance worker, I learned that's is no good to lie in those insurance things, after 20 days, the insurance declined the claim because I purposely hit the guy, now I'm stuck with a 5k usd debt for the repairs on the guy's car, motorcycle and my dad's car with a job that's pay me about a thousand dollars a month, while paying for my apartment and my college loan, F my life... TL:DR: I hit a guy thinking that's was a robbery, now I have a 5K debt Edit: just to clarify, this happene...

I’m 17 and can’t stop making problems that I feel are ruining my family. Today I got into my second car accident and after having even more of my stupid decisions thrown in my face I’m starting to realize just how much of a nuisance I am. My family has had issues almost my whole life. My parents never really got along and were pretty young when they got together. Especially my dad. Throughout my childhood I was blissfully ignorant of the m various issues my parents had. They separated about a decade ago now and still aren’t on good terms. I stayed with my mom after they separated and would see my dad every weekend. It stayed like that for years. I thought I adapted to the whole thing well but that was probably because I don’t know what I do now. My parent’s separation was extremely messy and I’m still finding out more to this day. The biggest issues were that my mom was extremely spiteful and for years tried all kinds of shit to get my dad locked up. My older sister helped a few tim...